Love continues

Okay, after I logged off I realized that I haven't written about the love that started last year, July 2009 to be exact. I am now past the honeymoon phase and into the real relationship phase with all the exciting, wonderful stuff and all the sad and loony stuff and I continue to learn new things about him and new things about me in how I relate and trust him. It's funny how we idealize everything in the beginning, okay, so it's hormones or something like that, but I am too old to have hormones wanting to find a man to propagate the species, right? But passion exists into your later years I am finding and that is a good thing, well maybe not for your hips?

It's like a life lesson that I should have had many years ago and am now just having where someone loves me and I trust and believe that love. For so many years I just kept this heart in check, it was easier to be alone and then I wouldn't get hurt or feel sad when that person was gone. Every day it is a risk to love and when you are in love, the risk is worth it. How do you keep on loving with the risk? Tell me. It is so scary. I keep looking into the future and have to step back because I only have today. It isn't really a zen thing to me. When you lose an important relationship like a parent when you are young or your own child, something changes in you that you know someone you love can be snatched away in a moment. Even love can be lost when you didn't expect it because you weren't seeing or reading the other person wisely when you should have, you just trusted. Oh my.