The Whole of Life

The start of 2009 is certainly a topsy-turvy of strong emotions. As I flew home from London, I watched a movie about a ghost of a husband who is trying to help his wife from beyond by connecting her with this dentist. It was appropriate to see flying home from London as the dentist is a Brit and the wife is American. Do the airlines think of things like this? The movie was entertaining but what I came away from the movie was this lovely little song by John Mayer. It strikes me that I like a lot of his songs - "Say", "Daughters", "Free Falling" and this song "The Heart of Life" that played at the end of the movie. It's lyrics so fit what I see around me. Julia downloaded it from iTunes for me and I listen to it now as I write.

A couple of weeks ago, my cousin Vince lost his little Pug Olive on my Aunt Rose's 85th birthday. Olive was a rescue that he had for a year and he was only getting her regular innoculations. An innocuous thing to do on a bright Saturday morning. You'd never expect that by nightfall, you heart would be full of pain, would you? My heart broke for him and his sister Jeanne, as they tried to be cheerful for their mom on her birthday.

This past week we celebrated the inauguration of Barack Obama into the presidency. The country was filled with emotion, awe, amazement - we were and are the most united I can remember Americans being since the Kennedy days. We will all remember where we were when the inauguration happened. As for Scratchy and me, we were in a vendor meeting from 8-10 a.m. - geez, what terrible timing!

But back to the song and the touching lyrics. I watch my daughter Julia struggle with the up's and down's of first love and loss and my heart breaks for her. I never realized when I had my daughters that you would suffer with them their losses of love. For some crazy reason, I thought that this was a private matter for them with their boyfriends, husbands, etc. I didn't know my heart would break along with theirs. I've seen it with my friends and their daughters too. All you think about is that little baby in your arms but as they grow, they are an extension of you and their joy is your joy, their pain is your pain.

Anyway as I think of Vince, Julia and Barack Obama, the lyrics strike me even more. "Pain throws your heart to the ground, love turns the whole thing around" "No, it won't all go the way it should, but I know the heart of life is good". Joy does return to us eventually after our hearts break open. Sometimes it takes longer than it should, I know.

Pray with me that the heart of this year 2009 will be good.

Thoughts while jet lagged

As I was returning from London this past Friday, looking out the airplane window, I remembered something Marjorie said about first entering the States from her native Scotland. (Marjorie owns the local tea place in Pacifica - Tranquilitea, if you ever get the chance, try to take in a cup of tea there - it is amazing.) Anyway, Marjorie commented that when she first landed in the States, she felt the energy of the busyness of the American people. The energy whizzed past her to and fro. I wondered as she told us this why she ever stayed here. How could you leave the calm of Scotland for the busyness of America? And where are we all running to and fro here? Although having just left London, the energy there is just as busy as the States, however, I do think there is more of a personal life for folks in London. They don't seem to have to be in the office at the crack of dawn and they leave for home at a reasonable hour. They seem to have a work-life balance. I noticed this when I worked at Barclays too.

Marjorie has created a little cozy respite here in Pacifica. Tranquilitea sits right by the bait shop on a very quiet, not heavily traffiked street. Marjorie lost her husband this past year and has to work now at another job as well as run the Tea shop. I hope she can maintain both but I don't know. She is now one of us busy American's, isn't she? When you walk into Tranquilitea, you feel instantly calm with the lavendar walls and white tables. I pray that Marjorie can maintain the peaceful Tranquilitea. I worry some days she won't be able to.